Blackbird (?) in lounge

You heard me.Pics + update coming soon.

off to get mah gun. cya!

Edit: anyone got any advice on how to remove/kill/hide from/eat it?

 

Update:

It was a magpie. sorry if I disappointed you. It looks like it came down the chimney. I have no idea why it would do that, but it couldn’t get up, so it’s a dumb bird, and it left sooty footprints on the fireplace.

We let it out and it flew away into the tree, leaving a lot of mess behind.

and now, here are the photos!